1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:05,000 This programme contains strong language and adult humour 2 00:00:05,040 --> 00:00:06,400 Urgh! 3 00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:08,680 Oh... 4 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:09,720 Whoo! 5 00:00:12,680 --> 00:00:13,880 SHE SCREAMS 6 00:00:15,520 --> 00:00:16,520 ROBOTIC CHATTERING 7 00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:17,600 I mean, you're useless at this. 8 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:20,520 SCREAMING 9 00:00:20,560 --> 00:00:21,800 SHE TRUMPETS 10 00:00:21,840 --> 00:00:22,960 Eurgh! 11 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:26,080 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 12 00:00:32,040 --> 00:00:34,080 Hello! 13 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:36,480 Welcome to Taskmaster, 14 00:00:36,520 --> 00:00:40,400 a bluebell of light entertainment popping up in a forest 15 00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:43,720 of Married At First Sight Australia horse dung. 16 00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:45,880 Let us begi-... 17 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:49,720 Let us begin the next round of the competition 18 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:52,480 and meet our mighty competitors once more. 19 00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:56,320 Please welcome Andy Zaltzman... CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 20 00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:59,520 ..Babatunde Aleshe... CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 21 00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:01,920 ..Emma Sidi... CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 22 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:04,120 ..Jack Dee... CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 23 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:06,640 ..and Rosie Jones! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 24 00:01:08,760 --> 00:01:10,120 And next to me, 25 00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:12,280 a man who drunkenly confided in me 26 00:01:12,320 --> 00:01:14,960 that whenever the presenter Fiona Bruce comes on the television 27 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:19,200 he can't help but rub himself against the arm of his sofa. 28 00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:24,040 It's Little Alex Horne! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 29 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:27,440 I've got an idea. 30 00:01:27,480 --> 00:01:28,600 WHISPERING: What is it? 31 00:01:28,640 --> 00:01:30,560 It's a money making plan for me and you. Ooh. 32 00:01:30,600 --> 00:01:32,520 Yeah, so I've been watching a lot of motor racing, 33 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:34,200 and, uh, they look cool, don't they, the guys, 34 00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:35,280 the motor racing guys? 35 00:01:35,320 --> 00:01:37,040 You know why they look cool? No. 36 00:01:37,080 --> 00:01:40,000 Cause they've got...they've got adverts all over their clothing. 37 00:01:40,040 --> 00:01:43,360 So I'm releasing little areas of of my coat. 38 00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:45,880 £15, £15 to advertise there. 39 00:01:45,920 --> 00:01:48,040 On the back... Oh... 40 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:50,440 £20. 41 00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:51,760 Yeah? Yeah. 42 00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:53,000 It works, 43 00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:54,840 people have already taken out advertising. 44 00:01:54,880 --> 00:01:57,440 Power Milk and Outdoor Crisps support in! 45 00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:01,920 That's my idea Greg. Are you in? 46 00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:04,160 I'm not in, no. 47 00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:07,240 Let's start the show! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 48 00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:11,840 The prize category this week is 49 00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:15,520 the thing that most makes Greg scratch his chin. 50 00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:17,880 SING-SONGY: Be-ard! 51 00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:21,720 Yes, what a strong chin it is 52 00:02:21,760 --> 00:02:23,640 to be scratched by such a mighty bear paw 53 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:26,600 on the end of such a funny, hairless arm. 54 00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:30,000 The legs are also hairless. 55 00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:31,280 Call me. 56 00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:35,320 Five points for the thing that causes the most chin scratching 57 00:02:35,360 --> 00:02:38,160 and then five fairly useless prizes for the winner of the episode. 58 00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:39,200 Take it away, Greg. 59 00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:40,880 Who is first today? 60 00:02:40,920 --> 00:02:42,200 Baba. 61 00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:43,360 Oh, no! 62 00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:44,840 Why are you saying that? 63 00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:48,160 I really tried to get something to make you scratch your chin 64 00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:50,320 but in a way which you're, like, confused, 65 00:02:50,360 --> 00:02:52,400 so that's why I chose 66 00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:54,280 a paper plate. 67 00:02:54,320 --> 00:02:56,760 Yes, he did. Here is Baba's paper plate. 68 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:02,160 Are you gonna explain the paper plate? 69 00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:03,280 No. 70 00:03:09,680 --> 00:03:11,840 EMMA GASPS Yes! 71 00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:13,520 Got him! ANDY: He scratched his chin! JACK: Very good. 72 00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:14,760 Good. Andy. 73 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,320 I got you some, uh, some aftershave. 74 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:23,280 It's made out of mosquitoes, is it? 75 00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:25,240 It's made out of mosquito bite. 76 00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:27,720 So it's actually the saliva of the mosquito that, 77 00:03:27,760 --> 00:03:29,600 that creates the allergic reaction. 78 00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:31,840 So I'm going to get a lovely old big red chin with that, aren't I? 79 00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:33,480 Yeah, yeah. ALEX: Have a look at the other side. 80 00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:34,800 Look who uses it. 81 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:41,680 The absolute highlight for me is, 82 00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:43,760 "Now I scratch my chin like a real man." 83 00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:46,840 Very good. Uh, hello, Jack. 84 00:03:46,880 --> 00:03:48,120 Hello. 85 00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:51,200 Um, I've brought in a book and it's called the, uh, 86 00:03:51,240 --> 00:03:53,680 The Colin Phillips Book Of Information. 87 00:03:53,720 --> 00:03:55,920 OK. Take a look at the book. OK. 88 00:03:55,960 --> 00:03:57,600 ALEX: It is a genuine book from Jack. 89 00:03:57,640 --> 00:03:58,800 Oh... 90 00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:07,160 Do you know why the screwdriver is in there? 91 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:09,000 Uh, to try and escape from prison? 92 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:10,560 No, no, no. No. 93 00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:12,920 See, metaphorically, you're already scratching your chin, 94 00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:14,640 even though you haven't done it dramatically. 95 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:16,560 No. Cause you...you're puzzled now. 96 00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:22,160 But in the introduction, he explains how he is very loosely related to 97 00:04:22,200 --> 00:04:24,800 the man who developed the Phillips-head screwdriver, 98 00:04:24,840 --> 00:04:27,000 and that was a promotional version of the book 99 00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:28,640 which he thought would launch it... 100 00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:30,600 Uh, yeah. 101 00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:33,960 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Little bit. Little bit. 102 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:36,440 Thanks, Jack. Little mid-range scratch. 103 00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:37,480 Emma. 104 00:04:37,520 --> 00:04:38,720 So... 105 00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:40,360 ..I brought in... 106 00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:42,240 ..fake chin acne. 107 00:04:42,280 --> 00:04:44,240 AUDIENCE GROANS 108 00:04:44,280 --> 00:04:46,960 They look like you've knocked into a tray of canapes. 109 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:52,120 You ever had spots on your chin? 110 00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:53,400 Yeah, back in the '80s. 111 00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:55,400 And what would you do to kind of get rid of them? 112 00:04:55,440 --> 00:04:57,160 I used to love squeezing spots. 113 00:04:57,200 --> 00:04:59,040 Yeah. Yeah. Go on, what did it look like? 114 00:04:59,080 --> 00:05:01,000 If it was on my nose, I'd probably give it that, 115 00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:03,320 but even if it was on my chin, I'd probably give it that. 116 00:05:03,360 --> 00:05:04,560 Ah, you...! 117 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:06,760 That to me that is a tiny scratch... One squeeze and off. 118 00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:09,160 Argh! Great. Fine. Thanks, Emma. 119 00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:10,840 Rosie. Hello! 120 00:05:10,880 --> 00:05:11,920 Hello, there! 121 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:19,320 I have brought a genuine question for you. 122 00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:25,680 OK. And I really want you to think about it, 123 00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:30,440 so I made it into a scroll. 124 00:05:30,480 --> 00:05:32,360 Yes, here we go. Lovely. 125 00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:41,880 Would you rather make sweet love to my body... 126 00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:47,960 ..but with Alex's head... 127 00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:55,800 ..or Alex's body with my head? 128 00:05:59,840 --> 00:06:01,800 APPLAUSE 129 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:06,320 So... He's gone! 130 00:06:06,360 --> 00:06:07,800 That is brilliant. 131 00:06:07,840 --> 00:06:09,240 Answer me. 132 00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:11,840 She said, "Answer me." Hmm. 133 00:06:11,880 --> 00:06:13,800 I want to know too, Rosie. You want to know, do you? 134 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:16,360 OK... 135 00:06:16,400 --> 00:06:19,280 I would make sweet love... 136 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:21,160 ..to Alex's body. Ooh! 137 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:22,560 Hello! Because... 138 00:06:22,600 --> 00:06:25,760 ..because I think the humiliation that he will suffer 139 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:28,040 for the rest of his life... Yeah? 140 00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:30,240 ..will delight me. Yeah. 141 00:06:30,280 --> 00:06:32,880 And I quite enjoy chatting to you, 142 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:35,360 whereas I despise him. 143 00:06:37,560 --> 00:06:39,720 OK, Greg. Let's give some points out. 144 00:06:39,760 --> 00:06:42,320 We all know who... Sidi. Pimple's getting one. 145 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:44,080 Yes. One to you, Emma. OK. 146 00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:45,640 Absolutely rubbish. 147 00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:47,080 Baba and Jack take three. 148 00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:48,280 Joint third, got it. 149 00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:49,960 Uh, technically because it doesn't exist, 150 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:51,920 but it's very imaginative, you get four points. 151 00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:54,600 This dilemma is awful. 152 00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:56,920 Five points to Rosie Jones, four points to Andy Zaltzman. 153 00:06:56,960 --> 00:07:00,280 There you go. Well done, Rosie Jones! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 154 00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:02,960 Task time. 155 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:05,640 Well, well, well. Yes, it's time for a task, sure, 156 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:08,440 but also time for an eye test. Hmm. 157 00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:23,960 Baba! 158 00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:26,880 What's this? 159 00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:31,040 And that's the first time the helmet's come in use. 160 00:07:31,080 --> 00:07:33,000 Yeah. 161 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:36,160 Ah, yeah. I know what this is. 162 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:37,800 HE CHUCKLES UNCOMFORTABLY 163 00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:39,360 WINCING: Mm-m! 164 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:40,640 That's to wedge your head into. 165 00:07:41,840 --> 00:07:45,120 Oh, I like this. 166 00:07:45,160 --> 00:07:46,560 Comfy, isn't it? 167 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:50,000 Can I have it? No. 168 00:07:50,040 --> 00:07:52,320 Please? No. 169 00:07:52,360 --> 00:07:53,760 But... 170 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:56,520 No. 171 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:57,600 Gah! 172 00:08:00,200 --> 00:08:03,080 "Put on the special glasses. 173 00:08:03,120 --> 00:08:04,640 "Fastest wins." 174 00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:07,600 "Your time starts now." 175 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:08,680 These? 176 00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:10,320 No, they're not glasses. 177 00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:11,720 I hate opticians, 178 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:16,360 because you can never tell if the eye chart is actually in focus, 179 00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:18,720 or whether it's just a big scam. 180 00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:21,600 APPLAUSE 181 00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:27,840 Rosie's immediate reaction is, 182 00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:30,640 "I love this chair and I want to take it home," 183 00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:33,320 and Jack posits the theory that all opticians 184 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:35,920 are part of an international scam. 185 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:40,080 Could be! It could be! It could be. 186 00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:41,640 OK, well, first up, 187 00:08:41,680 --> 00:08:44,400 zut alors, it's Emma and Baba. GREG WHISTLES 188 00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:46,240 Are these the special glasses, yeah? 189 00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:47,680 They must be, bruv. 190 00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:49,760 But no - these ain't the special glasses. 191 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:51,320 Where are the special glasses at? 192 00:08:51,360 --> 00:08:53,600 "Tiar, tiar... 193 00:08:53,640 --> 00:08:56,880 "Tiar tropwo lebhsi deseehc." 194 00:08:56,920 --> 00:08:59,280 Pardon? I don't understand it either. 195 00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:00,840 "Ch..." Oh, cheesed! 196 00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:05,480 I'm not able to work with that. 197 00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:07,200 All right. 198 00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:08,800 Where are these special glasses? 199 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:09,920 Cheesed. 200 00:09:11,240 --> 00:09:12,680 See if there's anything in here. 201 00:09:12,720 --> 00:09:14,000 Oh! 202 00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:17,360 Oh-o... 203 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:18,880 That was bad of me. Sorry. 204 00:09:25,960 --> 00:09:27,720 Oh, for goodness sake. 205 00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:29,520 I don't want to open any more. 206 00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:32,680 Urgh. 207 00:09:32,720 --> 00:09:35,160 I was really hoping that was gonna be like a sort of 208 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,360 Temple of Doom moment where, you know... 209 00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:39,200 "Broaow!" ..or something, 210 00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:41,120 but it's not done anything there. 211 00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:43,280 No, different budgets. 212 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:46,160 I don't know how to speak... What's this, French? 213 00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:47,880 I can't speak French. 214 00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:50,640 Cheese. There's the cheese... 215 00:09:50,680 --> 00:09:52,400 I'm actually against the clock. 216 00:09:52,440 --> 00:09:55,760 There's a cheese dome, and I'm just going to look in there very quick. 217 00:10:02,680 --> 00:10:04,880 SHE SIGHS AND GIGGLES 218 00:10:04,920 --> 00:10:07,360 Yeah, brilliant. All right, well, that took a minute. 219 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:15,400 PRONOUNCING VERY PHONETICALLY: 220 00:10:17,320 --> 00:10:18,880 We're screwed, bro. 221 00:10:18,920 --> 00:10:21,960 IN FLUENT FRENCH: 222 00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:23,760 LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE Oh, my God. 223 00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:25,760 So, I did French at uni. 224 00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:27,960 What did you get? 2:1. 225 00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:30,280 Tell you what you get if you get a first - 226 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:31,920 the vocabulary of "socle". 227 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:33,400 I don't know what that means. 228 00:10:38,560 --> 00:10:41,120 You must look in the inside of a... 229 00:10:41,160 --> 00:10:44,040 ..socle. That is such an incredible shame. 230 00:10:44,080 --> 00:10:46,320 Socle... 231 00:10:46,360 --> 00:10:48,200 I'm about to call Eddie Kadi. 232 00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:50,120 He's Congolese but he speaks French. 233 00:10:50,160 --> 00:10:52,480 I might just have to quickly use WordReference. 234 00:10:52,520 --> 00:10:53,760 Can you hear me? 235 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:54,880 ON PHONE: I can hear you. 236 00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:57,080 Try and translate this for me, please. 237 00:10:57,120 --> 00:10:59,880 Uh, "Vos devez a..." 238 00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:01,920 Nah, man. What? 239 00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:05,680 Don't do that. Speak properly... Bro, I don't know French! 240 00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:07,000 I've consented to the cookies. 241 00:11:07,040 --> 00:11:08,600 But you haven't allowed all the cookies, have you? 242 00:11:08,640 --> 00:11:10,480 I'm under a lot of stress. I've allowed them all. 243 00:11:10,520 --> 00:11:11,760 Oh, my God. 244 00:11:11,800 --> 00:11:13,520 All right, I've sent it to you, bro. 245 00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:15,480 CACOPHANY OVER PHONE 246 00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:16,640 What is going on? 247 00:11:16,680 --> 00:11:18,800 Baba, Baba, one second, one second, one second. Yeah? 248 00:11:18,840 --> 00:11:20,720 Basically, you should look at the inside of the base. 249 00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:22,440 The inside of the base? 250 00:11:22,480 --> 00:11:23,960 "Base"! 251 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,840 Yeah, pede-... Pedestal! Pedestal. 252 00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:32,920 So insane. 253 00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:34,880 Bang! 254 00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:37,320 LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE 255 00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:45,720 You increasingly make really strange noises. 256 00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:46,840 I know. 257 00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:49,000 Have we got a couple of the noises that came out during that attempt? 258 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:51,040 I always isolate the noises. Here they are. 259 00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:52,240 Mm-m! 260 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:54,400 Oh-o... 261 00:11:54,440 --> 00:11:55,520 "Broaow!" 262 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:03,000 But we knew what she meant. 263 00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:05,160 I know what she means. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. 264 00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:07,680 I'm going to start using, "Braoaw." 265 00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:10,360 But the point is, they both found the special glasses! 266 00:12:10,400 --> 00:12:12,080 They did. Who shall we see next? 267 00:12:12,120 --> 00:12:13,800 Andy and Rosie? "Yes, I think so, Alex, 268 00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:15,320 "and great job on all the admin, etc." 269 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:16,920 Here we go. 270 00:12:18,080 --> 00:12:20,200 It feels like there should be a clue in there somewhere. 271 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:22,880 No, it's some strange tongue. 272 00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:28,440 Are these the special glasses? 273 00:12:29,880 --> 00:12:31,160 Is...is this enough? 274 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:34,120 Oh, that's not very special. Oh. Sorry. Right. 275 00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:36,080 OK. 276 00:12:36,120 --> 00:12:38,400 Is that...? That feels like it might come off. 277 00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:40,040 AUDIENCE GROANS 278 00:12:41,640 --> 00:12:45,280 I don't understand. 279 00:12:45,320 --> 00:12:48,560 Special glasses. Special glasses. 280 00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:50,360 I feel I'm missing one of your clues again. 281 00:12:53,560 --> 00:12:56,400 Why was that here? 282 00:12:56,440 --> 00:12:58,320 Is there anything behind the...? There's nothing. 283 00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,920 That comes off. 284 00:13:00,960 --> 00:13:04,320 And you know I'm strong, 285 00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:08,920 so if I break this, that's on you. 286 00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:10,600 I'm missing something here, Alex. 287 00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:13,200 The glasses. OK, yeah, other than the glasses! 288 00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:16,040 Right. 289 00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:20,480 Come on. 290 00:13:25,040 --> 00:13:27,200 OK, I mean, that was kind of obvious, wasn't it? 291 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:28,360 Are these special? I don't know. 292 00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:30,160 Depends on your attitude to flamingos. 293 00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:31,440 I've stopped the clock. They're special. 294 00:13:31,480 --> 00:13:32,480 I mean, it was right there. 295 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:33,960 I could've got that within seconds. 296 00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:37,080 Yeah, baby! 297 00:13:37,120 --> 00:13:40,880 Oo-ooh, oo-ooh, oo-ooh! 298 00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:42,600 Yeah! 299 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:52,840 I just think that two grown adults being told to look for some magic glasses 300 00:13:52,880 --> 00:13:55,480 and it being both their instincts to go, 301 00:13:55,520 --> 00:13:57,640 "Are these the magic glasses?" 302 00:13:57,680 --> 00:14:01,240 Sort of smacks of some sort of unravelling of some kind. 303 00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:05,120 Andy looked at the optician's board for quite a while, 304 00:14:05,160 --> 00:14:07,120 but he was just reading it forwards over and over again. 305 00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:08,240 Ironically, I'm... 306 00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:12,520 I'm Jewish, and the Hebrew text is written right to left, 307 00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:15,720 but, equally unfortunately, I'm a very, very lapsed Jew. Um... 308 00:14:15,760 --> 00:14:18,840 I didn't think to read right to left. 309 00:14:18,880 --> 00:14:20,360 How did they do? Give me some scores. 310 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:21,880 Both of them were quicker than... 311 00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:23,480 In French. 312 00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:26,080 Les deux... 313 00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:27,480 Le Zaltzman. Oui, ah, Zaltzman et Jones... 314 00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:33,560 Oui. Vites... 315 00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:35,960 Plus vites que les autres. 316 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:37,080 Oh. 317 00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:38,800 Je ne sais pas! Oui! 318 00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:40,240 Part One is complete. 319 00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:43,200 Here's the fuckin' adverts. 320 00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:55,960 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 321 00:14:58,280 --> 00:15:00,600 Hello, welcome back to the show. 322 00:15:00,640 --> 00:15:01,640 It's Part Two, 323 00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:04,120 and our cast have been busy looking for some special glasses. 324 00:15:04,160 --> 00:15:06,000 So busy, Greg. 325 00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:08,040 I mean, so busy! 326 00:15:08,080 --> 00:15:10,080 We've had four successes so far, 327 00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:12,000 and the answer is right under their noses. 328 00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:13,200 And talking of noses, 329 00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:15,760 finally, here's a man with a really lovely one. 330 00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:17,320 It's Jack Dee. 331 00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:22,080 Is there anything...? 332 00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:23,120 That's not... 333 00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:24,560 Oh. 334 00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:26,160 I need to look round the house, I think, 335 00:15:26,200 --> 00:15:27,520 if it's not these ones. 336 00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:30,960 Unless they've been hidden in here, and that would be... 337 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,720 You went... 338 00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:35,240 I didn't meant to. I didn't mean to do that. 339 00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:37,200 Oh, OK. But I did do that, yeah. Yeah, yeah. 340 00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:48,560 Um... 341 00:15:49,720 --> 00:15:51,560 I mean, this is special. 342 00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:54,880 I'm slightly surprised. 343 00:15:54,920 --> 00:15:57,200 Why? But I don't think I can deny that those are special glasses. 344 00:15:57,240 --> 00:15:58,520 I think... Thank you! 345 00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:00,680 Thank you. APPLAUSE 346 00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:03,040 Oh, come on. 347 00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:06,320 It was quite exciting when you put your hand near the special glasses 348 00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:08,160 and then you just wandered off 349 00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:10,520 and came back in with any old glasses. 350 00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:13,680 It's just a shame we didn't nail what special glasses were. 351 00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:14,760 It wasn't defined. 352 00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:16,160 What was the task? 353 00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,200 Well, it was to put on the special glasses. 354 00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:22,080 And isn't the elephant in the room here that they're goggles? 355 00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:24,960 Shall I tell you the times? 356 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:26,080 Tell me the times. 357 00:16:26,120 --> 00:16:28,120 Well, Baba was the slowest in 13:20, 358 00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:29,440 Emma 9:40, 359 00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:32,080 Rosie and Andy, only 30 seconds between them, 360 00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:35,840 Rosie 5:24, Andy 4:53. 361 00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:36,880 ALL: Oh... 362 00:16:36,920 --> 00:16:38,560 Jack the quickest, 4:23! 363 00:16:38,600 --> 00:16:40,360 Well, then, come on. 364 00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:42,000 But...but he must be punished. 365 00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:46,560 He must be punished for not finding the special glasses. 366 00:16:46,600 --> 00:16:48,520 We're giving him a sympathy point. Ah. 367 00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:50,440 So, the winner is Andy Zaltzman on this occasion. 368 00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:52,240 OK, so it's one to Jack, two to Baba, 369 00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:54,160 three to Emma, four to Rosie, 370 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:55,760 five to Andy Zaltzman! 371 00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:57,600 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 372 00:16:58,960 --> 00:17:00,840 In this episode, two leaders at the top. 373 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:03,360 It's Andy and Rosie on nine points. 374 00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:05,880 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 375 00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:13,560 Next - well, this one really is a great big barrel of laughs. 376 00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:31,520 BLASTS OF WHISTLE 377 00:17:33,360 --> 00:17:35,040 SIGHING: Oh, God. 378 00:17:37,200 --> 00:17:38,200 Hey, Rosie. 379 00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:39,520 ROSIE: Hiya. 380 00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:42,640 Hello. 381 00:17:42,680 --> 00:17:44,440 Hello, Emma. Hi. 382 00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:46,760 Couple of questions for you before we start. OK. 383 00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:48,600 How far do you think you've just walked? 384 00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:50,680 That's probably 40 metres. 385 00:17:50,720 --> 00:17:53,240 Yeah, 40 yards, 40 metres. 50 yards. 386 00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:54,360 A few yards? 387 00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:58,520 25 metres. 388 00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:01,160 43... 389 00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:02,200 ..yards. 390 00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:03,800 Briefly how are you in yourself? 391 00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:05,400 Well. Good. 392 00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:06,480 I'm great, bro. 393 00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:08,600 Yeah, I have my good days, have my bad days. 394 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:10,640 Six. 395 00:18:10,680 --> 00:18:11,720 Six? Yeah. 396 00:18:11,760 --> 00:18:13,280 Did you sleep well last night? 397 00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:14,760 Um, eight. 398 00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:16,400 Ten hours. 399 00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:18,760 No, I have a four month old. 400 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,040 I wore socks. 401 00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:21,760 Middle of the night, I had to take them off, 402 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:23,600 so that disrupted it a tiny bit. 403 00:18:23,640 --> 00:18:25,920 Knowing I was coming to a theme park, 404 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:28,120 I had a precautionary crap. 405 00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:31,120 Did you have any peculiar dreams? 406 00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:34,080 I mean, is running a 100-metre final on a... 407 00:18:34,120 --> 00:18:35,800 I was riding a pig. Is that peculiar? 408 00:18:35,840 --> 00:18:37,600 Can't remember my dreams, man. 409 00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:39,400 I don't dream. 410 00:18:39,440 --> 00:18:42,560 Uh, yeah, I think some admin stuff. 411 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,840 OK, so shall I open this? Yes, you should now. 412 00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:48,160 All right. 413 00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:53,080 "Be at the highest number barrel when Alex blows his whistle again." 414 00:18:53,120 --> 00:18:56,240 You're at number one currently. Number two is to your right. 415 00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:58,440 Oh, right. OK. 416 00:18:58,480 --> 00:19:01,200 "You may only move to the next barrel 417 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:05,200 "when you have completed the challenge at the previous barrel." 418 00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:07,840 "If you fail a barrel challenge twice in a row, 419 00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:10,040 "you must move back to the first barrel." 420 00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:12,000 I'm gonna fail this, bro. 421 00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:15,000 "If you are at an even-number barrel at the end of the barrel task, 422 00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:17,400 "you are disqualified." That seems harsh, Alex. 423 00:19:17,440 --> 00:19:20,840 Um, "You have as long as it took you to walk to this barrel 424 00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:22,800 "and read up to this line." 425 00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:24,680 Three minutes and four seconds. OK. 426 00:19:24,720 --> 00:19:26,200 I went really quick! 427 00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:27,800 You ran, yes. Yes. 428 00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:29,200 You've got two-and-a-half a minutes. 429 00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:31,680 You've got four minutes and ten seconds to play with here. 430 00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:34,160 Wish my dream had been longer. I could've told you more about it. 431 00:19:34,200 --> 00:19:36,640 That's 2:42 you've got. 432 00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:37,840 I didn't know that, though! 433 00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:39,480 You guys didn't tell me, "Yo, slow down." 434 00:19:39,520 --> 00:19:41,880 You've got six minutes and eight seconds. 435 00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:48,560 This is where the palsy comes in handy. 436 00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:50,160 Yes! 437 00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:54,720 "Your time started when you said the word barrel for the ninth time." 438 00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:55,760 We're off. 439 00:19:55,800 --> 00:19:58,560 APPLAUSE 440 00:20:00,960 --> 00:20:04,480 You never dream? I never dream, 441 00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:09,080 because I'm already living the dream. 442 00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:12,160 HE RETCHES 443 00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:14,640 Emma, you, uh, dream about admin, 444 00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:17,080 and you had to take your socks off in the middle of the night. 445 00:20:17,120 --> 00:20:20,280 Um, when women... 446 00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:23,160 Hang on a minute. 447 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,640 OK. Women are much likelier 448 00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:29,400 to orgasm if their feet are kept warm. 449 00:20:29,440 --> 00:20:30,880 What? 450 00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:33,720 This is new territory. 451 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:35,720 I don't... I know! People don't talk about... 452 00:20:35,760 --> 00:20:37,240 I don't know what the hell's going on. 453 00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:40,240 I don't need to go into it, do I? 454 00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:41,720 But that's it. Sorry, you're serious? 455 00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:44,400 Women are more likely to orgasm if they're wearing socks? 456 00:20:44,440 --> 00:20:46,080 No. 457 00:20:46,120 --> 00:20:50,240 If their feet are cold, they're less likely to orgasm. 458 00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:51,760 And you took them off? 459 00:20:58,200 --> 00:20:59,920 OK. Let's see some stuff. 460 00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:01,960 Right we're going to double-barrel to begin with. 461 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:04,960 It's Baba and Rosie. 462 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,800 "Throw an odd number with this dice." 463 00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:13,000 Brap! Come on. 464 00:21:15,640 --> 00:21:16,640 Uh... 465 00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:17,680 Number five. 466 00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:19,040 Yes! 467 00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:21,880 "Answer Alex's question correctly." 468 00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:22,920 True or false, Baba... 469 00:21:22,960 --> 00:21:23,960 True or false, 470 00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:26,640 humans have the same number of neck bones as giraffes? 471 00:21:26,680 --> 00:21:27,880 False. False. 472 00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:29,360 It's true. What? 473 00:21:29,400 --> 00:21:31,720 True or false, all the electricity powering the Internet 474 00:21:31,760 --> 00:21:33,360 weighs the same as a school bus? 475 00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:34,480 No. False. 476 00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:36,120 Correct, you can move on. Brap! 477 00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:37,240 True. 478 00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:38,520 It's false. Back to the dice, please. 479 00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:40,400 Oh, God! 480 00:21:43,120 --> 00:21:45,000 Three. You can move on. 481 00:21:45,040 --> 00:21:47,720 Pick any single red playing card. 482 00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:49,280 I'll pick the first one. OK. 483 00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:51,560 Correct. Bow! Come on! Let's go. 484 00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:53,960 One in every 15 people has a third nipple. 485 00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:55,440 True. False. 486 00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:57,600 True or false, Wayne Rooney's middle name is Paul? 487 00:21:57,640 --> 00:21:59,680 False. It is false. It's Mark. 488 00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:01,320 Yes! 489 00:22:01,360 --> 00:22:02,800 That one. 490 00:22:02,840 --> 00:22:03,880 OK. No. 491 00:22:05,360 --> 00:22:06,360 Back we go. 492 00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:08,480 Oh, shit! 493 00:22:08,520 --> 00:22:11,720 "Predict which hand Alex's whistle is in?" 494 00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:12,960 Your right hand. 495 00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:15,120 You have one more go. 496 00:22:16,280 --> 00:22:17,280 Your left hand. 497 00:22:17,320 --> 00:22:18,440 Correct. Come on, let's go! 498 00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:21,200 "Select an even-numbered bingo ball." 499 00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:22,920 OK. 500 00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:24,920 Yeah? Maybe a bit slower. 501 00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:26,640 Bro, you're wasting my time. 502 00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:28,560 There's one. What number, is it? 503 00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:29,600 55. 504 00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:30,640 Right, try again. 505 00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:34,560 29. Right, back to barrel number one. 506 00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:38,080 Oh, what? You've got one minute and one second left. Oh, man. 507 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:40,640 Three. 508 00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:42,600 Boom. One. Let's go. 509 00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:44,960 One in every 15 people have a third nipple. 510 00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:46,720 That's false. Correct. Come on. 511 00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:50,320 True or false the high-five was invented in 1977? 512 00:22:50,360 --> 00:22:51,760 False. True. 513 00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:53,080 True or false... True or false... 514 00:22:53,120 --> 00:22:56,200 True or false, the dialling code for Greece is 31? 515 00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:59,040 ECHOING: ..humans glow in the dark? ..lobsters are biologically immortal? 516 00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:00,400 True. BUZZER 517 00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:01,960 False. No, it's true. BUZZER 518 00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:03,520 True. False. BUZZER 519 00:23:03,560 --> 00:23:06,360 True or false, pineapples take two years to grow? 520 00:23:07,360 --> 00:23:08,440 True. 521 00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:10,320 Correct. 522 00:23:10,360 --> 00:23:11,720 I'll pick this one. 523 00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:13,520 Come on. Byup! 524 00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:14,560 That one. Correct. 525 00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:16,160 Come on! 20 seconds left. 526 00:23:17,120 --> 00:23:18,200 That one. 527 00:23:18,240 --> 00:23:19,600 Shyeah! 528 00:23:20,760 --> 00:23:21,840 Which hand is my whistle in? 529 00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:22,880 That one. 530 00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:24,440 No. Which hand's my whistle in? 531 00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:25,520 That one. 532 00:23:25,560 --> 00:23:27,160 Correct. Yes! 533 00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:28,720 Come out. 534 00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:31,640 This thing is rigged! WHISTLE 535 00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:32,760 That's your time up. 536 00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:34,920 You are on a barrel number five. 537 00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:36,240 Come on, bro! 538 00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:37,920 You've got a minute and 30 seconds. 539 00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:42,160 Um, yeah, I reckon I'm happy. 540 00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:45,640 OK. I'll stop there. Yeah. 541 00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:48,320 You got to barrel number five. WHISTLE 542 00:23:48,360 --> 00:23:52,440 More than halfway! I'm happy with that. 543 00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:55,000 APPLAUSE 544 00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:58,400 Thing was rigged. 545 00:23:58,440 --> 00:23:59,520 It was rigged? 546 00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:00,600 It was racist. 547 00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:07,040 ROSIE: I was so shit at that. 548 00:24:07,080 --> 00:24:10,280 No, don't talk yourself down just because you, a grown woman, 549 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:12,760 think that lobsters can live forever. 550 00:24:15,760 --> 00:24:21,000 But I want lobsters to live forever. 551 00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:23,720 Yeah, that's not how it works, Rosie. 552 00:24:23,760 --> 00:24:25,320 They both got the same score. 553 00:24:25,360 --> 00:24:27,560 Both got the same score of five barrels. 554 00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:31,200 It seems like a reasonably strong start. Yes. Who's next? 555 00:24:31,240 --> 00:24:34,000 Well, she ran to the barrels and spoke very quickly, 556 00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:35,800 reducing the time she had quite dramatically, 557 00:24:35,840 --> 00:24:38,120 so good luck to Emma Sidi. 558 00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:40,600 Oh! You've got two and-a-half minutes. 559 00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:44,360 "Throw an odd number with this dice." Cool. 560 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:46,320 You've done it. "Answer Alex's question correctly." Go on. 561 00:24:46,360 --> 00:24:47,360 Hello, Emma. 562 00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:48,760 Tr-... Quick. True or false.. Yeah? 563 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:50,800 Humans have the same number of neck bones as giraffes. 564 00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:52,560 Uh, false. 565 00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:54,480 It's true. BUZZER 566 00:24:54,520 --> 00:24:56,120 No, I can ask you a second one. 567 00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:59,120 True or false, all the electricity powering the Internet 568 00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:00,760 weighs the same as a school bus? 569 00:25:00,800 --> 00:25:02,960 True. It's false. It's the same as a plum. 570 00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:05,200 Go on. Back we go. You've got two wrong. 571 00:25:05,240 --> 00:25:06,480 BUZZER 572 00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:07,680 DING 573 00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:08,920 Hello, Emma. Yep. 574 00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:11,640 True or false, one in every 15 people has a third nipple? 575 00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:14,000 False. It is false. One in 80. 576 00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:16,360 "Pick a single red playing card." Right. 577 00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:17,720 DING 578 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:18,800 OK. 579 00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:22,240 "Predict which hand Alex's whistle is in." Your right. 580 00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:23,920 Well, I'm not, uh... 581 00:25:23,960 --> 00:25:25,040 Your right. Hello, Emma. 582 00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:26,120 Uh, yes it is. 583 00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:28,520 Good. "Select an even numbered bingo ball." 584 00:25:31,160 --> 00:25:33,280 I can't! Oh, just... How do these work? 585 00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:35,280 Uh, just turn the handle. 586 00:25:35,320 --> 00:25:36,400 18. 587 00:25:36,440 --> 00:25:37,440 Right, OK. 588 00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:38,960 "Eat a chocolate-covered coffee bean." 589 00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:41,960 BUZZER 590 00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:43,920 Oh, I know which... 591 00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:45,280 That was coffee, that was coffee! Yes. 592 00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:46,360 "Toss a head." 593 00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:48,560 BUZZER 594 00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:50,720 Oh, now you must go back to one, you did it twice wrong. 595 00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:52,120 How many...? Where do I have to go? 596 00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:53,600 Back to the beginning. Oh. Yeah. 597 00:25:56,480 --> 00:25:57,960 Yeah. Hello, Emma. Yeah, quick. 598 00:25:58,000 --> 00:25:59,800 You've got 45 seconds. I don't care. 599 00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:01,200 True or false, Wayne... Sorry. 600 00:26:01,240 --> 00:26:02,600 ..Wayne Rooney's middle name is Paul? 601 00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:04,160 Uh, true. No, it's Mark. 602 00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:05,920 I can ask you another one. Go. 603 00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:07,240 True or false... Yeah. 604 00:26:07,280 --> 00:26:09,920 ..the high-five was invented in 1977? 605 00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:12,000 False. No, it's true. Back to the dice. 606 00:26:12,040 --> 00:26:13,080 That's not true! 607 00:26:13,120 --> 00:26:14,600 Go on. Wait. 608 00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:17,720 True or false, J was the last letter added to the alphabet? 609 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,200 True. 610 00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:20,400 It is true. 611 00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:22,920 There you go. Right, OK. 612 00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:24,840 Uh, right! 613 00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:25,880 Uh... 614 00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:27,360 Right. No, not right. 615 00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:28,880 Where now? Well, I'll do it again if you want. 616 00:26:28,920 --> 00:26:30,840 OK. Right! No, it's still not right. 617 00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,680 Where now? Back to one. You've got ten seconds. 618 00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:35,280 AUDIENCE GROANS 619 00:26:35,320 --> 00:26:36,360 Go on. 620 00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:38,520 True or false, lobsters are biologically immortal? 621 00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:39,640 True. 622 00:26:39,680 --> 00:26:41,120 No, it's false. They die. 623 00:26:41,160 --> 00:26:43,720 Australia is wider than the moon. You've got two seconds. 624 00:26:43,760 --> 00:26:45,080 True, true, true, true! It is true. 625 00:26:45,120 --> 00:26:46,640 WHISTLE 626 00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:49,760 I'm at three. 627 00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:50,800 Just. 628 00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:52,320 I am at three, though. 629 00:26:52,360 --> 00:26:53,800 OK. 630 00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:56,120 APPLAUSE 631 00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:59,720 Fascinating that Emma was patently shit at that task, 632 00:26:59,760 --> 00:27:03,560 but had the demeanour of someone who was excellent... 633 00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:08,240 ..throughout, and was speaking to you as if 634 00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:09,960 you were getting in the way of her genius. 635 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:12,760 "Come on. Yeah, yeah. Mm-hm." 636 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:14,760 I think I was in a playful mood... 637 00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:16,040 Is that playful? 638 00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:20,560 I would've sworn the socks were off up there. 639 00:27:21,960 --> 00:27:23,320 That's the end of Part Two. 640 00:27:23,360 --> 00:27:27,640 Time for a break and a chance to look at that fitness watch that you've been wearing. 641 00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:29,640 Let me guess, time to stand? 642 00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:33,080 Put the cheese puffs down, your children need you! 643 00:27:33,120 --> 00:27:35,120 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 644 00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:41,800 APPLAUSE 645 00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:46,400 Welcome back to Taskmaster, 646 00:27:46,440 --> 00:27:50,040 where our speedy comedians are in a theme park surrounded by barrels. 647 00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:51,400 Yes, Greg. 648 00:27:51,440 --> 00:27:55,160 At last, the fast cast were asked to do a cast task in a vast park. 649 00:27:55,200 --> 00:27:56,800 Two manly guys left to go. 650 00:27:56,840 --> 00:27:59,520 That's right, it's Geoff Capes and Monty Don. 651 00:27:59,560 --> 00:28:03,200 Not really! It's Jack Dee and Andy Zee. 652 00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:06,520 Throw an odd number with this dice. 653 00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:07,840 1. 654 00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:10,120 Yeah. Welcome to barrel number two. True or false - 655 00:28:10,160 --> 00:28:12,640 humans have the same number of neck bones as giraffes? 656 00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:14,680 True. Correct. 657 00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:17,960 Could be a stacked deck where they're all...? That's black. 658 00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:19,480 OK. 659 00:28:19,520 --> 00:28:22,120 That's black again. Back to the beginning now, Jack. 660 00:28:22,160 --> 00:28:23,280 OK. 661 00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:25,080 Predict which hand my whistle is in. 662 00:28:25,120 --> 00:28:27,000 Left. This one? Yeah. 663 00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:28,160 Correct. Right. 664 00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:30,320 Correct. Yes. Yes, we move on. 665 00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:35,520 88. 666 00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:36,720 We move on. 667 00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:40,720 Oh. Two. 668 00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:41,800 Oh, that's an even number. 669 00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:43,040 Oh, it is, yeah, yeah. 670 00:28:43,080 --> 00:28:45,640 Eat a chocolate covered coffee bean. 671 00:28:49,520 --> 00:28:51,520 Yeah, that's a coffee bean. 672 00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:54,320 I got it right first time. That was lucky. 673 00:28:54,360 --> 00:28:56,920 Do you promise, Jack? 674 00:28:56,960 --> 00:28:58,920 It was a lie. 675 00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:00,200 Toss a head - as in with the coin? 676 00:29:00,240 --> 00:29:03,320 Yes, please. 677 00:29:03,360 --> 00:29:04,400 It's head. 678 00:29:04,440 --> 00:29:05,560 Right, that count as enough? 679 00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:08,000 Yes. Pull a lemon out from this, from this box. 680 00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:09,440 Is there a lemon in the box? 681 00:29:09,480 --> 00:29:12,360 Gonna find out. 682 00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:14,320 Congratulations, you have reached the ninth barrel. 683 00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:17,720 You have done really well, good stuff. Stop the clock. 684 00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:21,320 Yeah, that was coffee. That sounded more coffee. 685 00:29:21,360 --> 00:29:23,960 Yeah. OK. You've got 20 seconds left. 686 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:26,320 Toss a head. 687 00:29:26,360 --> 00:29:29,000 OK. 688 00:29:29,040 --> 00:29:31,520 I mean... You've got two seconds. 689 00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:33,560 Congratulations, you have reached the ninth barrel. 690 00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:35,720 You have done really well, good stuff. 691 00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:37,200 APPLAUSE 692 00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:43,600 I think Alex is extra sweet with Jack. 693 00:29:44,720 --> 00:29:47,640 No, no, I think he's a little bit nervous. 694 00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:53,920 I'm not sweet with Jack. Couldn't give a shit. 695 00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:55,440 You've changed. 696 00:29:57,640 --> 00:29:59,040 Yes, so both of them did very well. 697 00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:01,640 I mean, looking at Jack you wouldn't know he'd nailed the task, 698 00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:02,840 but congratulations, Jack. 699 00:30:02,880 --> 00:30:05,800 Oh, why don't you just kiss him? 700 00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:10,560 All five contestants ended on odd number barrels so well done. 701 00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:13,160 Tick. Tick. Emma, you came last though so one point to you. 702 00:30:13,200 --> 00:30:15,200 Rosie and Baba both managed to barrel five 703 00:30:15,240 --> 00:30:17,040 so you come joint third with three points. 704 00:30:17,080 --> 00:30:19,920 Andy and Jack both got to barrel nine so both get five points each. 705 00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:21,560 APPLAUSE 706 00:30:23,240 --> 00:30:25,160 Let's have another one. 707 00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:28,840 OK, uh, this one involves just three simple requests. 708 00:30:41,560 --> 00:30:43,560 Yo, yo, yo. 709 00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:49,440 Hello. 710 00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:52,120 You really don't look much different. 711 00:30:52,160 --> 00:30:53,760 What do you mean by that? 712 00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:57,480 Can I pretend there's a desk? 713 00:30:57,520 --> 00:30:59,640 Course you can. 714 00:30:59,680 --> 00:31:02,120 There's a task. Oh, yeah. 715 00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:04,840 Yeah. It looks like it's floating. It's floating. 716 00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:07,840 OK. Label a part of your body. 717 00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:10,240 Make a surprising noise. 718 00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:14,040 And do something interesting with your legs. 719 00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:15,920 You have one minute. 720 00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:19,520 Your time starts now. 721 00:31:19,560 --> 00:31:21,120 I just greased my hands. There we go. 722 00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:22,440 Why did you grease your hands? 723 00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:24,560 Uh, well, because my hands were dry. 724 00:31:24,600 --> 00:31:26,240 My head. Arm. 725 00:31:26,280 --> 00:31:30,960 My upper nose area. 726 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:32,960 Gemma. 727 00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:36,160 I'm gonna put that on the elbow, I think. 728 00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:40,560 What, what, what does it say? I saw the words "of truth." 729 00:31:40,600 --> 00:31:42,720 Nexus. 730 00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:43,960 Surprising noise. 731 00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:45,160 HE GROANS 732 00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:46,480 Woof-miaow. 733 00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:47,520 OH! 734 00:31:47,560 --> 00:31:49,480 Cra! 735 00:31:49,520 --> 00:31:51,040 Then do something interesting with your legs. 736 00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:52,920 Still got 40 seconds. Ooh. 737 00:31:54,800 --> 00:31:57,080 So they're sort of perpendicular and crossed. 738 00:31:57,120 --> 00:31:58,440 OK, yeah. 739 00:32:00,800 --> 00:32:01,920 Just doing something with my legs. 740 00:32:01,960 --> 00:32:03,920 That's lovely. Yeah. 741 00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:06,560 Right. 742 00:32:14,560 --> 00:32:17,480 That's your time up, Rosie. 743 00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:19,720 Right. Still got ten seconds. 744 00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:21,400 Oh, a shake at the end. 745 00:32:23,720 --> 00:32:27,120 Really quite low. Hmm. Oof. 746 00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:29,200 OK, thank you. 747 00:32:29,240 --> 00:32:30,640 So how does that work, then? 748 00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:32,840 Is that a sort of subjective judgment? 749 00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:34,880 Points wise? Yeah. 750 00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:36,800 Well, it depends what you, what you do now. 751 00:32:36,840 --> 00:32:38,720 Oh. 752 00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:40,560 Do these three things again. 753 00:32:40,600 --> 00:32:42,120 And again. And again. 754 00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:43,680 In that same order. 755 00:32:43,720 --> 00:32:45,880 Ah, blood man, what the hell? 756 00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:48,800 The most sequences completed within ten minutes. 757 00:32:48,840 --> 00:32:50,800 Ten minutes? Hmm. 758 00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:54,000 Wins. Oh, my word. 759 00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:56,400 Well, I think we're both regretting what's just happened. 760 00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:06,960 You tricked them into doing something that will be difficult 761 00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:09,360 to replicate over and over again, 762 00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:12,960 particularly when it involves the nexus of truth. 763 00:33:13,000 --> 00:33:14,360 The nexus of truth. 764 00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:18,640 Yeah. It is now in urbandictionary.com. We've added it. 765 00:33:18,680 --> 00:33:20,320 Yes. It wasn't there before. 766 00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:22,080 It's nice to leave a legacy for future generations. 767 00:33:22,120 --> 00:33:23,440 That's lovely. 768 00:33:23,480 --> 00:33:26,920 OK, well, with a woof-miaow and an oof, it's Andy and Rosie. 769 00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:30,400 Here we go. Was it upper nose area? It's quite a long phrase, isn't it? 770 00:33:30,440 --> 00:33:32,840 Ah. I wish I'd chosen a shorter phrase 771 00:33:32,880 --> 00:33:35,360 but, you know, a nickname's a nickname. 772 00:33:35,400 --> 00:33:36,880 Right. Ah. 773 00:33:36,920 --> 00:33:38,520 Woof-miaow. 774 00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:41,920 OH! 775 00:33:45,760 --> 00:33:48,080 Lovely. Yeah. Right, come on, up you get, up you get. 776 00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:50,440 I haven't got time. You'll have to be a bit quicker. 777 00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:53,480 Sorry about this. This is not the way we wanted our careers to go. 778 00:33:55,880 --> 00:33:58,360 Oh, sorry, sorry. 779 00:33:58,400 --> 00:34:00,440 Again. Quick. 780 00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:02,280 Please. 781 00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:06,000 OH! 782 00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:07,440 Assume the position. 783 00:34:07,480 --> 00:34:10,000 Yeah. 784 00:34:17,880 --> 00:34:21,800 Is this legal? Not everywhere. OK. 785 00:34:21,840 --> 00:34:26,600 Hi, Rosie. Upper nose. Oh. 786 00:34:26,640 --> 00:34:28,760 Oh, that's slowed it down. Fuck. 787 00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:36,360 That's on. Woof-miaow. 788 00:34:36,400 --> 00:34:40,920 No. You're getting this all wrong. Ready for the noise. 789 00:34:40,960 --> 00:34:43,920 OH! 790 00:34:46,240 --> 00:34:50,840 Yeah. Have I done like 100? Yeah, if we round it up. 791 00:34:53,400 --> 00:34:54,840 Woof-miaow. 792 00:34:54,880 --> 00:34:58,600 18. 18? One more? Let's, let's go for it, Alex. 793 00:35:03,040 --> 00:35:07,000 Come on, come on, up. Five seconds. 794 00:35:07,040 --> 00:35:10,280 Right, I don't think I'm gonna get it on. 795 00:35:12,320 --> 00:35:15,480 APPLAUSE 796 00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:24,480 Well, powerfully homoerotic, I'm sure we can all agree. 797 00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:28,680 Pleased with that, Jones? Uh, I couldn't write it 798 00:35:28,720 --> 00:35:32,320 cos of the palsy! 799 00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:36,920 But he, he pulled his weight. 800 00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:38,160 We worked together, didn't we? 801 00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:40,320 Yeah. Yeah. In fact, all three of us tried our best there 802 00:35:40,360 --> 00:35:42,840 and not a bad total in, in ten minutes, 803 00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:47,360 16 complete cycles for Rosie, 19 in the end for Andy. 804 00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:49,120 So that's the bar set pretty high. 805 00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:52,200 APPLAUSE 806 00:35:52,240 --> 00:35:56,800 Next up to repeat their three things it's Baba and Ja-ba. Here we go. 807 00:36:00,320 --> 00:36:01,440 Hi, Jack. 808 00:36:01,480 --> 00:36:04,400 Hi, how you doing? Yeah, not bad. Thanks. 809 00:36:04,440 --> 00:36:07,200 My head. 810 00:36:07,240 --> 00:36:08,520 Uh, there you are. 811 00:36:08,560 --> 00:36:10,760 Hi, Alex, you all right? Yeah. 812 00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:13,560 Hand. Hand, right. And then, uh... 813 00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:14,720 Did the noise. 814 00:36:14,760 --> 00:36:17,960 And then the thing. Thing. Correct, yes. 815 00:36:18,000 --> 00:36:22,080 Come on. Again. Oh, no, I've gotta shake hands with you, bro. 816 00:36:22,120 --> 00:36:25,440 Baba. Man like come on. Done one. All right. 817 00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:27,520 All right, you've done it once in one minute. 818 00:36:27,560 --> 00:36:29,760 Ah. OK. 819 00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:32,120 Here we go. Hmm. 820 00:36:32,160 --> 00:36:33,880 OK, hello, Jack. 821 00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:36,560 Hi, hiya. Hmm. I need to focus. 822 00:36:36,600 --> 00:36:37,680 Yeah. 823 00:36:37,720 --> 00:36:40,000 Oh, I put legs. It should be leg. 824 00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:41,800 I'll write another one. 825 00:36:41,840 --> 00:36:42,840 OK. 826 00:36:45,160 --> 00:36:46,200 Hi. 827 00:36:46,240 --> 00:36:47,400 Afternoon. Jack. 828 00:36:47,440 --> 00:36:48,800 Right. 829 00:36:48,840 --> 00:36:51,560 Hi. Hello, Jack. 830 00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:55,040 Bro, I don't know too many other parts of my body. 831 00:36:55,080 --> 00:36:58,160 Hand, head, uh... 832 00:36:58,200 --> 00:37:00,320 Pleased with the noise you chose? 833 00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:02,640 You know, it's not too demanding. 834 00:37:04,640 --> 00:37:07,000 It's fairly easy to re, to, you know, reproduce. 835 00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:19,240 Hi, nice to meet you. Hi, there. Oh, there we go. My nose. 836 00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:20,560 Yeah. My ear. 837 00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:21,600 Ear, right. 838 00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:22,840 It's all coming back to me, bruv, 839 00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:26,440 the biology. You know what I'm saying. Forehead. 840 00:37:26,480 --> 00:37:27,600 Yeah. 841 00:37:27,640 --> 00:37:29,720 Oi. Science teacher would be proud. 842 00:37:29,760 --> 00:37:32,160 Yes. Couple more, do you think? 843 00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:33,360 Easy. 844 00:37:37,240 --> 00:37:38,560 Come on. 845 00:37:38,600 --> 00:37:41,280 I'm not gonna lie, this is a lot, bro. 846 00:37:41,320 --> 00:37:44,160 It does seem like a lot. I didn't know you had that many body parts. 847 00:37:44,200 --> 00:37:47,000 This is it, we learn something together, my guy. 848 00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:51,120 APPLAUSE 849 00:37:54,160 --> 00:37:56,680 You think your science teacher would be proud? 850 00:37:56,720 --> 00:37:59,320 I can cl... I think what we can, uh, 851 00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:03,160 see from that is I am reaching breaking point. 852 00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:11,240 And Jack has already surpassed that, you know what I'm saying. 853 00:38:11,280 --> 00:38:14,400 Oh, Jack's gone. Well, it's one of those things where you do that 854 00:38:14,440 --> 00:38:18,000 and then you go home and hope that no-one says 855 00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:20,400 what did you do at work today. 856 00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:21,680 I don't, he was focused. 857 00:38:21,720 --> 00:38:24,520 He did one action every five seconds. He got a total of 40. 858 00:38:24,560 --> 00:38:27,280 40! Wow. Smashed it. 859 00:38:27,320 --> 00:38:31,200 Define interesting, in the context of this. 860 00:38:31,240 --> 00:38:33,400 Do something interesting. With your legs. With your legs. 861 00:38:33,440 --> 00:38:34,720 Yeah. Oh, here we go. 862 00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:38,120 Yeah, Krusty the Clown is questioning it. 863 00:38:40,920 --> 00:38:42,680 He's... 864 00:38:47,920 --> 00:38:52,280 He's all irritable, cos he's made his nexus of truth sore. 865 00:38:54,200 --> 00:38:55,200 I mean, I... 866 00:38:55,240 --> 00:38:58,840 Well, I know I'm not sweet for Jack in any way. 867 00:39:00,480 --> 00:39:02,120 But I did find his leg action interesting. 868 00:39:02,160 --> 00:39:04,960 He was sort of kicking back. Ah. I'd never seen him do that before. 869 00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:06,080 Oh, was it interesting? 870 00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:08,360 Time for the last ad break of the show. 871 00:39:08,400 --> 00:39:10,480 Please return for the final part 872 00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:13,680 where in a new low, someone will win a paper plate. 873 00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:18,080 And Channel 4 will once again ask the question, 874 00:39:18,120 --> 00:39:20,160 where are they spending the money? 875 00:39:20,200 --> 00:39:22,120 We'll see you in a bit. 876 00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:24,960 APPLAUSE 877 00:39:32,480 --> 00:39:36,400 Welcome back to the final part of this Taskmaster hoedown. 878 00:39:36,440 --> 00:39:38,480 Before the break, things were getting very repetitive. 879 00:39:38,520 --> 00:39:40,720 They had to label a part of the body, make a surprising noise 880 00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:42,720 and do something interesting with their legs. 881 00:39:42,760 --> 00:39:44,800 And then repeat those things as many times as possible, 882 00:39:44,840 --> 00:39:47,680 and what's more, the last person to attempt the task 883 00:39:47,720 --> 00:39:49,000 is dressed as a hot dog. 884 00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:52,040 Double points for Emma on this one. Here we go. 885 00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:53,560 Gemma. Cra! 886 00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:55,840 How long did that go on for? 887 00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:57,280 25 seconds. 888 00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:01,160 Oh, God. 889 00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:04,440 The last five seconds are very low if you remember that. 890 00:40:06,720 --> 00:40:08,760 I don't think this is OK. 891 00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:12,480 Cra! 892 00:40:12,520 --> 00:40:14,160 Then I start going low, I think. 893 00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:19,760 It's actually quite intense on my calves. 894 00:40:19,800 --> 00:40:21,480 Hmm. 895 00:40:21,520 --> 00:40:22,840 Ooh! 896 00:40:22,880 --> 00:40:25,960 Cra! Ooh. Emma. 897 00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:30,320 I'm really worried about people from, uh, school seeing this. 898 00:40:30,360 --> 00:40:33,480 But there's nothing I can do. 899 00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:35,640 That's 25 seconds. 900 00:40:37,360 --> 00:40:40,200 Cra! 901 00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:42,920 Couple more seconds. 902 00:40:42,960 --> 00:40:44,840 Cra! 903 00:40:44,880 --> 00:40:48,400 I am broken, man. Oh, my God. 904 00:40:53,720 --> 00:40:55,120 45 seconds. 905 00:40:59,480 --> 00:41:00,600 Cra! 906 00:41:07,120 --> 00:41:09,560 Oh, my God. 907 00:41:14,000 --> 00:41:15,680 Oh, fucking hell. 908 00:41:15,720 --> 00:41:19,680 APPLAUSE 909 00:41:22,960 --> 00:41:25,440 It was heart-breaking. You looked in agony by the end of it. 910 00:41:25,480 --> 00:41:27,000 Yeah. I was hurting for days. 911 00:41:27,040 --> 00:41:28,160 Oh, really? Yeah. 912 00:41:28,200 --> 00:41:31,320 And who are these people from school you're worried about? 913 00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:35,240 You know, just, uh, just the bitches, really. 914 00:41:35,280 --> 00:41:37,920 And they would've bullied you for dancing like that? 915 00:41:37,960 --> 00:41:43,760 They would've been like, "Oh, you're an Elvis hot dog." 916 00:41:43,800 --> 00:41:46,800 Well, we enjoyed your pain very much, well done. 917 00:41:46,840 --> 00:41:48,480 We enjoyed your pain. Yes, 918 00:41:48,520 --> 00:41:51,400 Emma managed to get through 13 sequences. 919 00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:53,960 Emma came last but her one point is doubled because of the hot dog. 920 00:41:54,000 --> 00:41:55,720 Two points to Emma, two points also to Rosie 921 00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:58,640 and fourth it's three points to Andy with 19. 922 00:41:58,680 --> 00:41:59,880 Four to Baba with 21 923 00:41:59,920 --> 00:42:03,080 but five points obviously to Jack with 40. Wonderful. 924 00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:05,520 APPLAUSE 925 00:42:07,280 --> 00:42:09,400 Quick look at the scores, then. 926 00:42:09,440 --> 00:42:12,200 Yes, this episode is being led by Andy Zaltzman. He's on 17 points. 927 00:42:12,240 --> 00:42:14,000 APPLAUSE 928 00:42:14,040 --> 00:42:16,120 Hey, it's that time again. 929 00:42:16,160 --> 00:42:19,160 Please make your way to the stage for the final task of the show! 930 00:42:19,200 --> 00:42:22,600 APPLAUSE 931 00:42:26,640 --> 00:42:28,440 Hello, Greg. Hello. Who's gonna read the task? 932 00:42:28,480 --> 00:42:30,680 Baba's gonna read the task. 933 00:42:30,720 --> 00:42:32,720 Say the same word at the same time. 934 00:42:32,760 --> 00:42:34,480 Alex will give you a category. 935 00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:38,000 Taking it in turns, team members must both say one word 936 00:42:38,040 --> 00:42:40,600 that fits the category at the same time. 937 00:42:40,640 --> 00:42:44,040 If both team members say the same word at the same time, 938 00:42:44,080 --> 00:42:45,320 they win the round. 939 00:42:45,360 --> 00:42:49,640 Also you must not say a word that has been said before. 940 00:42:49,680 --> 00:42:52,680 Most in sync team wins. 941 00:42:52,720 --> 00:42:55,920 So it's a team task, Greg. I'm gonna read out a category. 942 00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:59,400 Yeah. And the teams will take it in turns to both say 943 00:42:59,440 --> 00:43:00,520 a word at the same time. 944 00:43:00,560 --> 00:43:02,560 You must not communicate with each other in any way 945 00:43:02,600 --> 00:43:05,160 and your third party will swap in after each round. Mm-hm. 946 00:43:05,200 --> 00:43:08,240 You're not involved while you're on that chair. All right, cool. 947 00:43:08,280 --> 00:43:11,200 First category is fruit. 948 00:43:11,240 --> 00:43:13,920 Three, two, one. 949 00:43:13,960 --> 00:43:15,760 Apple. Ples. 950 00:43:18,520 --> 00:43:21,640 APPLAUSE No. 951 00:43:21,680 --> 00:43:25,040 We all heard Baba say "ples." 952 00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:29,320 Three, two, one. 953 00:43:29,360 --> 00:43:31,440 Bananas. Banana. 954 00:43:31,480 --> 00:43:34,560 There we go. APPLAUSE 955 00:43:34,600 --> 00:43:38,240 It's team two to go first this time. The category is farmyard animals. 956 00:43:38,280 --> 00:43:40,840 Three, two, one. 957 00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:42,000 Cow. Cow. 958 00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:44,000 Wow. 959 00:43:46,240 --> 00:43:49,640 This time you go first. The category is European countries. 960 00:43:49,680 --> 00:43:52,040 Three, two, one. 961 00:43:52,080 --> 00:43:53,720 France. France. 962 00:43:56,960 --> 00:43:59,520 OK. You have the serve, Jack and Rosie. 963 00:43:59,560 --> 00:44:01,800 The category is parts of the body. 964 00:44:01,840 --> 00:44:04,400 Three, two, one. 965 00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:05,720 Hand. Foot. 966 00:44:05,760 --> 00:44:06,960 Finger. Nose. 967 00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:08,320 Tongue. Boobs. 968 00:44:08,360 --> 00:44:10,800 Tongue and boobs, I mean... Tongue and boobs. 969 00:44:10,840 --> 00:44:12,720 I have to go sit down for a bit. 970 00:44:14,840 --> 00:44:17,040 Three, two, one. 971 00:44:17,080 --> 00:44:18,320 Shins. Shoulder. 972 00:44:18,360 --> 00:44:19,760 Shin and shoulder. 973 00:44:19,800 --> 00:44:20,920 Three, two, one. 974 00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:21,960 Liver. Liver. 975 00:44:22,000 --> 00:44:23,040 Yes! Yes. 976 00:44:23,080 --> 00:44:26,720 APPLAUSE 977 00:44:28,680 --> 00:44:30,400 Yes! 978 00:44:30,440 --> 00:44:35,200 Such a strange one to get right as well. 979 00:44:35,240 --> 00:44:37,280 It's boring boys' names. 980 00:44:37,320 --> 00:44:38,840 Three, two, one. 981 00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:40,360 Mark. Alex. 982 00:44:40,400 --> 00:44:43,960 Oh, bollocks. Alex. It was, it was an open goal. 983 00:44:44,000 --> 00:44:47,240 Not Alex or Mark. Ready. Three, two, one. 984 00:44:47,280 --> 00:44:48,920 Colin. Greg. 985 00:44:48,960 --> 00:44:52,800 Back over. Three, two, one. 986 00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:54,480 Mike. Graham. 987 00:44:54,520 --> 00:44:56,280 Brian. Matthew. 988 00:44:56,320 --> 00:44:57,920 Dave. John. Oh. 989 00:44:57,960 --> 00:44:59,440 Wayne. James. 990 00:45:03,240 --> 00:45:04,880 We've got this. 991 00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:07,040 Have we? 992 00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:09,320 Three, two, one. 993 00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:18,160 Where did fucking Gilbert come from? 994 00:45:18,200 --> 00:45:20,560 Can I just say something? 995 00:45:20,600 --> 00:45:23,320 Anything. I've ran out of white names. 996 00:45:26,560 --> 00:45:29,840 Can I tag my friend in? Oh, that's a good idea. 997 00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:32,680 You can tag Emma in. Yeah, tag her in. Great. Let's go. 998 00:45:32,720 --> 00:45:34,360 Three, two, one. 999 00:45:37,920 --> 00:45:40,840 APPLAUSE 1000 00:45:44,840 --> 00:45:47,040 So close. Team one. 1001 00:45:47,080 --> 00:45:48,760 Three, two, one. 1002 00:45:54,960 --> 00:45:56,280 Oh. OK. 1003 00:45:56,320 --> 00:45:59,800 Just to clarify this. We're gonna carry on for the rest of time? 1004 00:46:01,680 --> 00:46:03,840 What happens is, in this situation, Greg... Yeah. 1005 00:46:03,880 --> 00:46:07,840 ..they each now have to say a name belonging to someone on the stage 1006 00:46:07,880 --> 00:46:10,640 or one of us to win. We'll get a winner this way. 1007 00:46:10,680 --> 00:46:14,280 OK. Team one. Three, two, one. 1008 00:46:14,320 --> 00:46:15,840 Alex. Alex. 1009 00:46:15,880 --> 00:46:18,840 APPLAUSE 1010 00:46:23,520 --> 00:46:25,360 Feel the rush. 1011 00:46:25,400 --> 00:46:29,400 Let's add those points to the final scores. Come down and join me. 1012 00:46:29,440 --> 00:46:31,720 APPLAUSE 1013 00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:35,360 Good to see the team of two in sync there. 1014 00:46:35,400 --> 00:46:38,600 They won the task. They get three points for winning three rounds. Oh. 1015 00:46:38,640 --> 00:46:41,000 Team of two gets two points for winning two rounds. 1016 00:46:43,960 --> 00:46:47,520 Which means that Jack and Rosie are now in joint second place 1017 00:46:47,560 --> 00:46:48,920 with 17 points, 1018 00:46:48,960 --> 00:46:52,320 but the winner of the episode with 19 points, it's Andy Zaltzman. 1019 00:46:52,360 --> 00:46:54,720 Zaltzman wins! 1020 00:46:54,760 --> 00:46:57,600 Andy Zaltzman wins. 1021 00:46:57,640 --> 00:47:00,040 Please go and collect your selection of things 1022 00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:01,760 that'll make me scratch my chin! 1023 00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:04,520 APPLAUSE